Marriage and Anniversary !!

Hi Everybody ! I must admit that I am married to a girl who managed to live with me for an year now (Hmm...I think I need to ensure my wife never visits my blog!). Yes ! today is my First Marriage anniversary.

Marriage perceived by many in many different ways !. Anniversaries for many a happier moment and for some its just another day!.

AFAIK, these days most of the relationships are under pressure from varous quarters. I know of few of my friends who keep complaining about their marriages broken or at the verge of breaking.

I perceive some of the following reasons as strong contenders which obviously if not attended properly and with much attention surely to rift any relationship.

1. Expectations (spouse, parents, family and other relations)
2. Communication Gap
3. Lack of Love and interest with spouse/partner (psychologically first, physically next, sexually last)
4. Noncommital
5. External pressures (Job,finance, kith and kins)

Recently, I came across few cases of my friends whose marriages have gone to the level of divorce in a short span of "one plus years". Ironically, they all have "new born baby" as a witness of their marriages.

I happen to deal with one of these cases who is my close friend. In his case, the boy and a girl were willing to live together (although girl had certain demands to be met which my friend was willing to adjust) while her parents weren't ready for the same.Boy was under financial crisis during the rift, however Boy's father was ready to support him financially until he gets stabilized.

Marriage is really a social responsibility. Surely one must admit that the perception of female and male about everything is totally differnt. Male and female approach a problem from totally different perspective.we must also admit that even though we may live as "husband and wife" under a single roof, we are two different biological beings altogether having our own feelings, emotions, sentiments, convictions etc.

Does marriage means that either of us have to give away their true identity (Generally, its women who are victimized!) for the sake of it?. Does it mean that one has to always sacrifice while the other would just enjoy the benefit?. Does it mean that both a boy and a girl have to give up what they were and start a fresh and new life for themselves?.

What is more important? A boy and a girl living together happily or making their parents happy?. Is there any marriage which has never been into troubled waters?. Even those who have married after years of loving each other, don't they fight among themselves?.

Whether having conflicts of interest and confrontation with spouse is real bad for marriage?.Can 't these conflicts and confrontations coexist in a happy relationship?. Who is at fault in any crumbling marriage relationship?. whom do we blame?. Is it as perceived by many that women as these days feel independent and self-reliant, they tend to act smart in marriage?.Or else is it that a 'patriarchal society' which is crumbling and is at fault?.

Any comment and insights !

"Blessed are those who are not married for they havn't seen the hell yet" and

"Very blessed are those who are married for they are privileged to be in heaven".