Women and Marriage - Hilarious

Some Hilarious comments on Women and Marriage,

• I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste. David Bissonette
• When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her. Sacha Guitry
• After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together. Hemant Joshi
• By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher. Socrates
• Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them. Dumas
• The great question... which I have not been able to answer... is, "What does a woman want? Sigmund Freud
• I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me. Anonymous
• Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays. Henny Youngman
• I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years. Sam Kinison
• There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage. James Holt McGavran
• I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me, and the second one didn't. Patrick Murray
• The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once... Anonymous
• You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to.Henny Youngman
• My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met. Rodney Dangerfield
• A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong. Milton Berle
• Marriage is the only war where one sleeps with the enemy.Anonymous
• A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: "Wife wanted". Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can have mine". Anonymous
• First Guy (proudly): "My wife's an angel!" Second Guy: "You're lucky, mine's still alive."
• Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming

1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it,

2. Whenever you're right, shut up. Nash